Coffee, cheap tricks and crazy options

Written By Unknown on Kamis, 08 November 2012 | 21.16

Prajwal Hegde
08 November 2012, 01:07 PM IST

The most enjoyable part of the beverage-drinking experience outside India is not so much the quality of the fare, though that is a factor, but the easy exchanges with brewer and cashier.

Store managers and brewers in Bangkok or Boston don't badger customers with information from the moment they walk through the doors of their coffee shop. But Bangalore is different. Ditto with New Delhi and Mumbai.

No sooner have I placed an order in any of the coffee chains that have outlets across India and I'm inundated with questions. With cream or syrup? Caramel or Irish whatever? Be warned, these toppings and flavours cost extra and are pricey even though they're made to appear like an option rather than an add-on. And should you forget to mention size, you are served and charged for a bucket-sized measure. This is not how it works in the rest of the beverage guzzling world. God be praised. Once an order is placed in Sydney, Singapore or San Francisco they simply get on with the business  of preparing your drink the way you like it. No crazy options. No cheap tricks.

Another annoying practice among coffee chains India is their demand for exact change. The moment you pull out a 500 rupee note for a Rs 125 bill, it is raining questions.  
"You don't have change ma'am?"

 Obviously not.

"Uhhh, uumm… We don't have change."

Pause.

"Do you have a card?"

If you don't have a debit or credit card you simply have to wait as the unhappy cashier plunges into the various cabinets stacked behind the cash counter from where finally a plastic cover with change emerges. Most Café Coffee Day outlets are guilty of this practice as are the Costas, Baristas and Au Bon Pains.

However in other countries and cultures, places where plastic money rules, they happily oblige with the exact change. No questions asked. In London for instance if one produces a 20 pound bill for a drink that costs 2.45 pounds, you are given the exact change back. It's not a 50 p coin and along with your least favourite candy.
It is not about economics obviously, rather a certain etiquette.

In India it isn't uncommon for a customer to be advised on his drink should his order break with convention. An extra hot cappuccino for example. He is instantly propped with classes on coffee making.  A waiter will tell you that it cannot be made `piping hot' because `cappuccino' is warm coffee, while latte is the hot variation.
Like you didn't know.  What they don't get is that it is the prerogative of the cash-popping customer.

When the person across the counter asks for a Café Mocha `less sweet' it might beat logic, but it makes perfect marketing sense to simply pipe down on the pump and serve-up a less sweetened version of the drink. Get on with it. No one is asking to see Russia from some point in Alaska!

Starbucks, the American global coffee chain, has an endearing message for customers at most of their outlets. It reads: We promise we will make your drink just the way you like it. And please don't be shy, just let us know if it is not and we'll make it again for you. After all it is personal.

That's basically all it is. Personal.


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