13 September 2013, 06:07 PM IST
The guy's put 'sex' back into the limp Sensex. That makes him seriously hot. So hot, in fact, he has made it to the Amul hoarding (a first for a chap in his lofty position). But nobody is calling the man a Billboard Bimbo. You know why? Because this man knows his onions.
And right now, onions are playing a major role in our lives. Forget our obsession with gold. We are hoarding onions now.
All hail the freshly minted 23rd RBI Guv — the very dishy Raghuram Govinda Rajan — the Messiah of Markets. At 50, Rajan is young (come on, SRK at 48 is still playing lover boy), brilliant (IIT-IIM-MIT vaghera, vaghera) and on the ball (ex-IMF chief economist). That his chiselled features are as sharp as his brain, add to his current status as the poster boy of banking.
Funny how quickly Rajan has been slotted as a much-panted-after sex symbol (he took over from Duvvuri Subbarao on September 4). He's the guy who's got the groove. I plead guilty, too.
Recklessly and happily, I went ahead and tweeted (will this woman never learn?) about his appointment, calling him the Ranbir Kapoor of banking (note the spelling — banking, there's an 'a' in this word, not an 'o'). Why not? Rajan's sex appeal has propelled him straight into the league of movie stars. He can easily top 'India's Most Desirable' lists.
Had he not been in this tricky, ultra conservative (let's be upfront here, and call it tight ass) assignment, he'd have been instantly snapped up by smart celeb managers and signed juicy endorsement deals. Sorry, Raghu. But you are stuck. Deal with it.
The media has declared Raghu the latest sex symbol in the land. He should lie back and enjoy the attention. It's not often that one gets an RBI guv who makes hearts (not just female ones) go dhak dhak each time he strides into a room. I entirely endorse the positioning. Why should only comely ladies in the rarefied world of finance get branded and walk away with all the compliments?
India had gone ga ga over Enron's blond bombshell Rebecca Mark. But that was decades ago. We desperately needed eye candy on the pink pages — and now we have it! To my friends in media, I say — flog Raghu mercilessly. Run his pictures every day. We'd rather look at this pin-up boy, than Sunny Leone. I rather like the reverse stereo typing taking place with our Raghu.
Move over Chanda Kochchar. You've had your turn under the sun, in your lovely designer sarees and perfect make up. It's time for the hunks to take their rightful place and reclaim lost territory.
Raghu's impeccable professional credentials are a given, and we are most impressed by the degrees, papers, essays, books. But this global wanderer (his father was in the IFS and the family moved across continents when Raghu was a kid) is back where he belongs. India may not be his comfort zone just yet. But hell ya! We need Raghu more than he needs us. Let's face it! The fact that the blunt Raghu believes in saying it like it is, makes him the darling of the biz papers.
"Analysts are like Indian cricket fans," he'd famously declared, referring to the fickleness of desi investors. "A few years ago, India could do no wrong. Today, India can do no right," he'd brashly told the world, not so long ago.
In 2010, he'd made an inspired prediction regarding India's imminent financial crisis — "Self-delusion is the first step towards disaster." Oooops! The disaster is right here, right now. And we are fervently hoping the high-minded hottie will wave a magic wand and save us from self-destructing ourselves. They say men at 50 (do remember, 50 is the new 30) are generally in a good place — even a great one.
'Feisty at Fifty' could well be the title of Raghu's memoir (I'd be delighted to publish it). Till he writes his own story, we can salivate from the sidelines and watch the Miracle Man of Markets as he weaves his magic and gets us out of the financial mess we are in.
This is just a paparazzi alert, my friend. We'll be watching you — every move you make, every step you take. Make sure you don't drop that towel, like Ranbir Kapoor did in Sawaariya. On the other hand..... aahhhhh.... wishful thinking!
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