13 April 2014, 03:47 PM IST
I know it's a buzzing era of women's liberation and emancipation, and rightfully so! It's been centuries of oppression in a patriarchal society, being subjected to just an extension of a man as someone's daughter, someone's sister, someone's wife, or someone's mother. With women coming into their own and being shoulder-to-shoulder with men in the workplace, breaking glass ceilings and revelling in their freedom and independence and with laws changing to protect and empower women, females are riding a wave of strength. However, it seems in the battle for equality, the concept of equality has become a bit skewed. For example, if a man whistles at a woman it's sexual harassment, but if a woman whistles at a man it's women empowerment? If a man talks openly about his affair with a woman he's indecent, but if she talks about it, she's honest? If a man respects his parents' wishes and is obedient, he's a mummy's boy, but if a girl does the same to her parents she has 'sanskriti' and good values? If a man orders his woman around he's a boor and if he listens quietly he's henpecked? Whereas if a woman orders her man around she's considered 'a strong woman' and if she listens to his ordering her around, she's a doting, caring wife? Why does women empowerment have to equate to male bashing? If the quest is for equality, why discriminate against men? Let's truly be equal and let the same rules and leniency apply for women that do for men, and vice versa.
Q&A
I am a 14-year-old girl and like a guy in my class. He flirts with me a lot but I am not sure whether he likes me or not. What should I do?
If he flirts with you, it means he finds you attractive. If he flirts with everyone, it means he's playful and not serious. At your age, just smile at everything, take it as a compliment and focus on studies. It's an obsessive trap to get into the guessing game. If he likes you enough, he will come forward and state it clearly.
I have been in love with a girl for a long time now. But I never got an opportunity to propose her. Initially I was scared that she would reject me and then I got so busy with work, that I would not find time to meet her. Now I've got to know from common friends that she is in love with someone else. I really want to get in touch with her and tell her how I feel. But I am still confused. What should I do?
When the window of opportunity was open, you didn't make the most of it. Now that she's committed to someone else, to try and confuse her, or scare her or creep her out is just foolishness. You've waited so long, now wait a little longer and observe whether her relationship status changes. If it's in your destiny, you might get another chance, but if she takes it forward to the altar, then let go gracefully.
I am a 20-year-old girl and in love with a guy who is 22. We both love each other a lot but belong to different communities. While he is a Muslim, I am a Hindu. Even though he loves me a lot, he keeps saying that his parents will not accept me and that I should think about getting married to someone from my community to avoid any problems in our lives. What should I do?
Well, he's being realistic and simplifying the future. If he felt he had the courage or capacity to either change things or to defy them he would have. He's made his emotional stand clear, and sometimes, love just takes a back seat or a hike! Walk off! Short term pain, long term gain!
I am a 15-year-old guy and in love with a girl from my class. I have tried talking to her a couple of times but whenever I approach her, she walks off saying that she gets annoyed when I try talking to her. It hurts me a lot and I don't know what to do.
Rejection is always painful especially at your age. Either she is not into relationships or she's not into you. Either way, respect is an integral part of any relationship, so show her some respect and back away. If she feels differently about you, she will make it known.
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